The Map

 A map tells you how to get somewhere you say you want to go.  It can be on paper or on computer with AI.  You would think it silly if someone got the instructions in detail and then set out without following the instructions exactly.  “I got this figured out,” says the ego.  I know about where to go!  So what good is a recovery program if you are not willing to follow the directions exactly.  Religion says, “Do this and you will live.”  AA says it for its own twelve steps.  Not six or seven you like, but all twelve.  The Ten Commandments are Ten and Six.  And so on.  I have found that following directions gets me there sooner and with less hassle.  

The Choice

 For the Addictive Person, the choice for a while is drink or don’t drink.  But that is a delusion because the person addicted, always choose to drink.  Then the choice changes.  It becomes “change or die.”  So let’s not delude oneself about a spiritual practice.  We think for a while, when our prayer life is shallow, sporadic and sometimes fox-hole, that we can say “pray or not pray.”  But over time, as life gets less meaningful and less satisfying with “stuff” we see that prayer of some greater depth, meditation, more time in quiet with oneself, is not optional.  The body may stop drinking, but the soul always searches for spiritual Power.  

Not Enough

 When you use recovery programs as meetings where you meet people and have some sober social life, you may feel good for a while but it is not enough.  You need to go deeper for a change that is true “recovery.”  You need a spiritual practice that goes beyond the social and the hearing of the message with the ears.  It is a bit like going to church and that is the only time you pray and maybe not even meditate.  You connect with your God, but not deep enough to effect the change that God wants and you need to become your best self.  

Holy Indiffeence

 Indifference can be holy.  How?  We are indifferent to the results of our actions.  But we do act.  And we act trusting that the results are up to a more forceful and spiritual power than anything I have just with my own ego as the acting force.  I know that God is in charge.  I am not all that powerful nor am I all that wise, to have something turn out a certain way.  Failure can be humbling to the ego, but not to one who has abandoned themself to the will of God.  Even my action depends on the Grace of God.  So I act and do my best.  

The Interruptor

 You never know when you might be interrupting someone’s death.  They may be on a downward spiral of behavior with no hope in sight.  It is one thing to tell them to stop doing this bad lifestyle.  What hope is there in that?  If you can offer them some hope, maybe with your own story of hope, it might give them a glimmer.  That is one way you interrupt their death.  So be on your own spiritual path that includes hope, change for the better and a more selfless life.  

Sees Fit

 I tell my God that I give all of me, the good and the bad.  This way I don’t have to be just good in order to attempt surrender.  But then I say, “Do with me as you see fit.”  I figure God is going to do good stuff and remove all my bad, or not so good.  But that is not what I prayed for.  I said, “as you see fit.”  What if God decides to leave some of my character defects, my bad habits with me?  Humm.  For what purpose?  Maybe to keep me humble.  

Approval

The problem with not feeling like we are enough is that we often need someone else’s approval to confirm that we are enough.  We build our life on the opinions of others.  We don’t accept our being little, imperfect, weak.  This might be why we become more unsettled as we age.  We diminish in ways that are new to us.  “We used to” but now we cannot or cannot do as we did.  I try not to base my day and my aging on someone’s approval of me.  It is a gift to be alive today.  So I must have some purpose with my diminished skills.  Meditation reminds me that God loves me.