What Changes?

Sometimes when people get into a spiritual path or recovery program, they think that their life will become easier.  Their spiritual path, tool kit of recovery, will click in on a daily basis and their difficulties will disappear.  Not so, I have found.  What changes is me, not the circumstances of life around me.  I grow up and have better tools, emotional sobriety, people to help advise me, and such so that I can handle life's situations better.  Health issues, financial issues, bosses, work issues, rush hour traffic, partner issues do not just disappear, but I don't have to go to pieces over any of them on a daily basis.  And if I need to make a change, I begin with me, and then if more is needed, I have guidance from new friendships, wise and balanced people in my life, and my own spiritual practice to give me the courage and compassion to make the change.  I try to begin with me each day.  Otherwise, I will just whine, complain, and be full of useless self-pity about the world around me, and make no adult decisions to do much of anything.