Rusted Servant

I have heard of “trusted servant” as in someone who can be trusted to be of service, to do a job to help others.  I just heard of “rusted servant” someone who did a job and is now finished or no longer able to do that job.  I have found myself to be a ‘Rusted Servant” and it used to bother me.  Why? Well, I was finished before I was ready to be finished.  Since I am not employed full time in any parish, I am free to go and help out other places.  A parish may be short a priest, and they are very enthusiastic, even pleading, for my help.  Then I get attached, and even delusional, that I am a real part of that community work.  Then suddenly they don’t need me because they got  a permanent replacement, for instance, or figured another way to do things.  The calls, requests, suddenly stop.  I became a rusted servant.  While my ego was deflated, I have found this to be tremendously freeing, because then I can choose to do something else.  I am not obligated to that parish or work.  Time for the monastery, time to travel (before Covid) and teach other places, visit with people, all open up to me.  So, the next time you become a “rusted servant” think of what might open up to you, rather than focus on what is closed.