Dinner Listener

I am a good listener at dinner.  It is because I am left-handed.  My Mom taught me that the knife goes on the right side of the plate and the fork on the left when setting the table.  I learned this when my sister Maureen and I washed and dried the dishes.  I had to set the table at night for breakfast the next morning.  The knife is on the right because most people are right-handed.  They cut their meat with the right hand and hold the meat in place with the fork in the left hand.  The knife does all the skill work, so the right-handed people get to have the knife where they can just pick it up on the right side of the plate.  After they cut their meat, they put the knife down and switch the fork from the left hand to the right so that they can pick up a piece of meat and eat it.  Table setting was for the rich.  Poor Irish did not eat meat. They did not worry about table settings.  We were lace curtain Irish with table settings.  Now a hungry left-handed person like me, simply adjusted.  I learned to cut my meat with my right hand.  Then I kept the knife in my right hand and stabbed my fork into meat, now cut, and ate it.  No switching hands.  No wasted motion.  This is how I learned to eat fast.  So when I was dating and took a young lady to dinner, I would simply ask her something, and then while she talked, I ate.  I was a fast eater and hungry.  None of these women wanted to marry me as it turned out.  After I finished eating I just wanted them to finish so I could get to dessert.  I think that my vocation to the priesthood might have developed from being left-handed.  I guess that is why God made me left-handed.  Whatever we are, God gave us this for a good reason.  I am still a good table setter too, and a good dishwasher.  Why God, did no one want to marry me for all these domestic talents?  Their loss!