Ordinary

I am afraid that my recovery from insanity is in danger of being ordinary.  I always thought that once I got on a spiritual program of prayer and selfless acts, such as priests are supposed to do, I would grow and grow until one day I would be a guru who floats along in a good mood and at peace every day.  In all honesty, it has not gone as I had envisioned.  The sanity of peace, acceptance, selflessness, humility, being non-judgmental, is all fleeting. It seems to come and go, plus I really have to work at maintaining a sane balance in my life.  I find that when I am feeling balanced emotionally and relationally, that is when I need to work the hardest at my spiritual program to maintain this sane space.  If I wait until I am feeling in a darker space, I have trouble braking the downward spiral.  So my thought for today is be grateful for what you have and take nothing for granted.  Spirituality is action.