Amends

Some people think that the word, "Amends" means that you say you are sorry.  Huh?  Saying you are sorry does not change bad behavior for which you are sorry in the first place.  "Amends" does not mean sorry.  Someone reminded me that it means, "Become a better person."  In other words, change your behavior.  Saying you are sorry and having no further plans for change, simply is an attempt to make yourself feel better.  It is all about you.  It is selfish.  I have found it so when I go to confession in my church.  If I simply say I am sorry, but have no plans for change, it is all about feeling better.  Does God feel better?  Not on my agenda at that moment.  One of the best ways to apologize is to change for the better in relationship to the situation in which you are saying you are sorry.  Well, how do I change?  Left to my own power, my own desire, my own will, I won't change.  After too much bad behavior, my power, desire, and will are pretty broken or weak.  I need a power better than me.  To paraphrase St. John the Baptist, "I must become less so that the power can become more."  I might do more, and do better, but not make me the center of my attention.  Meditation helps.  Humility might show up!