The Love Process

You hear someone say, “We fell in love and then we got married.”  But it does not always, if ever, go that two step simple.  Here is another process someone related to me.  “We fell in like. We fell in lust, and then we fell in love.”  To go from lust to love, one must realize that they have more to offer than sex.  This realization comes from the partner relationship.  You learn to accept and be with one another, to value each other, without there being a “catch.”  My Catholic Church does not like the process of going from lust to love, and many parents are real Catholic when it comes to this.  But lust to love is real, so we might as well face it and see how the process can work out for the best.  The relationship begins to build to some permanence when the couple realize that sex and lust are not so primary.  You become a person and not a body.  You don’t come together with some end of the evening trist planned.  Being together and sharing life becomes more and more wonderful.  And you learn that sex fixes nothing much worth fixing.  Selfish, self-centered people, often start and end with lust.  They don’t like themselves very much, so they won’t like anyone else.  Love is foreign to self-imploded people, but the truly clueless think lust is love.  I hope I never come back as a teenager.  It was a rough time for me the first time through.  It seemed to last forever.  But then I digress!