Cosmic Christ

What is the "Cosmic Christ?"  More importantly, am I going to become a better person because I believe in a Cosmic Something?  I think not.  Why, you ask?  Well, I think I might feel ashamed, or guilty about doing bad stuff.  I might be disgusted with myself, which is really an ego trip.  But I won't change if I think the offense is against a cosmic something or an amorphous power out there.  I will just go on doing the same bad behavior over and over.  Change will only come when I realize I have offended some person.  The offense has to be personal.  It is between me and the offended one.  For Christians that would be Jesus Christ who is not cosmic.  He was and still is human.  He has a humanness about him.  Recovering addicts in 12 step programs know this when they do their 4th step and look at their side of the street.  When they realize that they offended persons, that is when the energy for change comes.  That change begins with an apology to the offended person.  I don't apologize to the cosmic universe.  I get the theology, and the Oneness idea, but I am into me changing, and that is a one on one realization.  If my God is too big to be offended, then what is the point in me being sorry and wanting to change?  My God is too big to be angry, and judgmental, but plenty small enough to be hurt by the mess of my self-will run riot.