Saturday, May 11, 2019

Ego

A too big ego is unmanageable.  When I am in this state, I tend to try or think I can do things that I cannot do, that are beyond me.  So I need to get a second opinion from someone who knows about big egos.  I cannot manage things that are beyond me.  Failure, and the expending of wasted energy are the results.  Another reason that big ego is unmanageable is that when I act on it, the impetus is to get the approval, and esteem from others.  I end up trying to do things that in fact I do not enjoy, simply for praise from others.  But I cannot guarantee that praise, much less that I will be noticed.  So this goal cannot be managed either.  Daily, I try to keep a right size ego that is useful to others and does not beat myself up.  If my resentment list remains empty, this is a good indicator that I am staying right-sized.

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