Fellowship

 AA is a lot like organized religion in that both are spiritual paths and both are communal.  Neither AA nor religion will release its benefits if one sits on the edges, or simply attends.  People come to AA meetings and sit alone in the back.  They come late and leave right away, talking to no one.  They hear AA “scriptures” and information, but such people rarely get sober, and usually will drink again after some bad behavior called a “dry drunk.”  It is the same in organized religion such as mine.  People come to the worship building, sit in the back, talk to no one, come late and probably leave early.  They are there for themselves and not others.  In both cases there is no involvement or working with or for others in the group to which they attend.  There is no communal fellowship and so such people stay on the edges, change little for the better and often just drift off saying, “it didn’t work for me” or “I don’t need all that stuff.”  I don’t speak from judgment, but from experience.  I find the full benefits come not just from private reading or attendance, but from volunteering in a way that is helpful to others, to the group.  Transformation, growth, is not private, but communal, to receive and share with others what we are receiving through our spiritual paths.  

Using Tools

It is one thing to buy a bunch of tools to fix things and it is another thing to use the tools you bought.  The spiritual life is fragile and needs constant tooling.  I can never take my inner work for granted.  Life can get sideways real fast if I don't do a daily maintenance with the tools that I have.  I have a book or two of suggestions as to how to keep my life working in a good balance.  But if these books sit on a shelf or at my elbow, or under my coffee cup or cell phone, they won't do me much good.  Soon enough I will be quite broken and then the repairs would be major and painful.  So, each day, early, I reach into my spiritual tool box and retool for the day.  Yesterday's maintenance was for yesterday.  It is a brand new day I have never lived before.  So each day I am a beginner.  Tools at the ready!

Getting Out

 One of the reasons that I do things for others, is to get out of my head.  I like to cook for others only in part because I like to cook.  It also can get me out of stinky thinking or thoughts that just feed my own weaknesses.  Or it might keep me from thinking I am in solitude when in fact I am in isolation.  Cooking for others is a connector and if I find myself being resentful or frustrated while preparing a meal, I note to myself why I am doing his in the first place.  I am being of service to help me and to help others.  Their response is above my pay scale.  Such things as cooking can keep me sane so long as I don't try to do too much in order to be praised.  I can easily miss bad motives or trip over them before I see the light.  Easy does it in the kitchen.  

A New End

 I hear someone say, “Today, I will make a new start!”  On will-power, they may do so, in part because of embarrassment at a loss, health issues, shame or guilt.  They have good intentions, but soon, all too soon, they are back into old behavior.  Someone gave me good advice.  It was to comprehend a new end.  On a blotted ego I can maybe make a new start.  It has no long term to it.  It is self-driven.  But to think about a new end, way down the road, seems more daunting.  A new end I cannot do alone.  I need help.  I am well-practiced in old behavior and can easily repeat it.  But new behavior that will last the long haul requires a power I do not have, and this is why I call it spiritual.  Think of someone who says they are going to get into good physical shape by running, which they have rarely done.  They can do it for today and maybe tomorrow, but then it is back to old behavior on the couch.  But think of a new end. A marathon run of 26.2 miles.  That gets you out there on the trails on a regular basis and maybe you need some running buddies to help you along.  I could use some running buddies.  None at the monastery.  

Becoming Real

 “The more real you become, the less that it hurts,” said the Rocking Horse to the other toys in “The Velveteen Rabbit.”  All the toys wanted to become real.  This wise saying means that I can do difficult things, even seemingly painful things, as long as it is really who I am.  I am energized when I am really me rather than trying to do something that is not me so as to please someone else or out of fear, or out of ego, pride.  I suspect a parent knows this in relationship to their child.  Someone who is doing a work, their vocation, their truer self knows this.  There are times, maybe each day, when circumstances call for us to do something that is not who we are.  But then we need to add something that is our truer self and feed on that energy.  I call it the Holy Spirit.  

Beginner

 When you wake up each day, think of yourself as a beginner.  Have a beginner’s mind.  You have never experienced this day to which you are waking.  With a beginner’s mind you can have the attitude of being open to what the day offers.  You can experience the day rather than sleepwalk through it.  Sleepwalking would mean that you never did fully wake up to the day.  You are just passing through.  

Hidden Fullnes

 Within each of us there is a hidden fullness of all our possibilities.  We don’t know it is there because it is hidden.  I call this hidden fullness, God.  Well, God or not, how do we access this creative energy to be all that we can be?  Silence, and I don’t mean simply not making noise.  Even when we make no noise on the outside, our insides, our mind, feelings, affections are making lots of noise.  So the silence needs to be one of not paying attention to inner or outer noise, and this is what I call meditation.  It needs to be deep in order to access the hidden presence.  This does not mean we see something, or have visions.  That would appeal to the imagination.  It must be deep enough so that we gradually change for the better.  We touch our hidden fullness.  We move from fearing love, to wanting to love, to loving inconsistently, fits and starts, to becoming love.  I am still too noisy, but working on it.  Not in charge of results, just effort on a daily basis.