Repentance

To change one's life, or "repentance" as it is called in religious circles, does not begin with, "I will try harder."  It begins with humility.  It begins with admitting that left to ourselves we won't change/move in a new and better direction.  We must admit that we are weak.  We got into the mess of a lifestyle because we are too weak to make the better choice.  We have formed habits that keep us moving in the same wrong direction all the time.  So, start out with admitting you messed, be sorry or at least embarrassed by your bad behavior and seek some outside help.  God is one form of outside help.  In the bible, Jonah, (the fellow who was swallowed by a whale) goes to a big city, Ninevah, and tells everyone to repent.  What do they do?  They don't say, "We will try harder."  They admit they are wrong, and put on sackcloth and sit in ashes.  This is a sign that they are sorry and want help.  They don't waste initial energy on trying to get better.  First they seek forgiveness and a second chance.  When you mess up with someone you love, do you simply say, "I will try harder," as if you have the power to alone change your life?  No.  You admit you were wrong.  Say you are sorry.  And seek help.  Try changing your life by yourself from bad to good.  I suspect all you will get is going from bad to worse.  I have found it so.