New Wisdom

Some of the best wisdom lessons I have learned, and remembered, is after I think that I know it all, or know enough.  The "know enough" is really about a lot of control.  I read and therefore I learn.  My efforts gain me wisdom.  I pray and get "more spiritual."  I do good works, be helpful, of service, and my world gets better.  I feel better.  It is all about, "I do, I get."  It is very good and beneficial, but it is not all, not by a long shot.  Maybe we take a few things for granted, based upon our efforts, or cut back on our efforts, or just enjoy the good feelings.  Then it happens.  An event takes place, a loss, a betrayal, a relationship or job gone bad, and I realize I don't have all that much control given my efforts.  What to do?  Surrender to the spiritual entity that had seemed kind of predictable.  Most of us never get this far.  I struggle with it on a daily basis.  I will never know enough, or pray enough or do enough good deeds to control my world and avoid all unpleasantness.  Of course, it will be a better world than when I did few to none of these positive things.  But it will no longer give me perfect security, power, control, or esteem, as I thought it would.  The learning curve goes up steeply, when I realize that over some things, I am powerless, and my spiritual control programs will not change that.  But a new spiritual depth will be discovered.  God is at work.