Birthdays

I met a guy who got drunk because no one at the office remembered his birthday.  No one took him to lunch.  Nothing.  So he went out, got drunk, skipped work the next day, lost his job.  Wow! Resentments can be costly.  But feeling badly, lonely, forgotten, ignored, heart-hurting, over people forgetting your birthday is quite common.  If you are brought up like me, with family making a big deal about your birthday, you are not prepared for the grown up world where you may well be ignored on your birthday.  Now if a spouse forgets, you can make them pay.  But if work associates, the outside world forgets, you have to lower the bar.  We are not the center of the universe for most of the world.  Rarely has any priest with whom I have lived ever remembered my birthday.  So this coming year I may just go to the monastery, be in my cell, and thank God for another year of some sanity when my birthday comes around.  Don’t tell people when your birthday is because then you raise expectations.  People have lots of other stuff more important for them to do than remember your “special day.”  And don’t get drunk over it.