Filler Upper

Why do many people in their 20s want something big and exciting to happen in their life?  I suggest that it might be because they are empty inside and this is the "Filler Upper" whatever the exciting thing is they are looking for.  It might be marriage, a career move, an advanced degree, falling in love, or LSD, or whatever they ingest nowadays.  When I was in my 20s I did not know I was empty on the insides.  I was "unfulfilled" maybe, or sometimes bored, or thought my life meaningless, but it did not occur to me that outside stuff would not fill the inside.  I entered seminary/religious life when I was 29.  This was my ticket to happiness!  Wrong, but sometimes, we make a good decision but for a wrong reason.  It was the best I could do to fix me.  It did not fix me.  But God works with whatever we give God and so I stumbled along being of some use to others.  Fortunately, no big deal was made of my ordination by my group. There were 9 of us, too many to focus all the attention on any one or two like we do today.  Plus, I don't think anyone from my parish came to the ordination.  My homilies were kind of fluff, though kids liked them.  I could aways connect with kids, maybe because I had not grown up yet.  But eventually, I spoke three of the best words ever and it was a miracle.  I NEED HELP!  And help came to me.  Today, I still stay in touch with help.  I am not doing life under my own power.  And kids still like my homilies, though they will have to come to a monastery now to hear them.