The Dead

November is the month that my religion celebrates the dead.  I don't know why we do this in November, but since November is supposed to inaugurate dark and gloomy in the Norther Hemisphere and Death kind of has a dark and gloomy thing about it, November would be a good fit.  St. Benedict, who wrote a rule for monks says that each day we should remember that we are going to die.  Well that will keep us real and rightsized.  But it is not just about physical death.  There is another dying to remember and it comes from our baptism.  Most of us in my religion got baby baptized.  That is when, to me, we began to die to being who someone else wants us to be, and forged the road to becoming who God made us to be.  That is not an easy road.  In this Thanksgiving week, there is a big hoopla about shopping, buying, spending.  The culture wants consumers.  I don't think I am my best self when I buy stuff neither I or anyone else needs or can fit into their lives.  Jobs try to make us conform to someone else's expectations  or wants.  Schools can do this.  No one is in charge, and few are really interested in us becoming who we truly are.  It is a tough thing to die to external powers trying to mold us.  Well how do we know we are becoming our best self?  We will become better lovers, with acceptance, patience, kindness, and compassion for other people, especially people who are not conforming to our desires for them, or are not part of our group, tribe or social club.  We are a work in progress.