Following up on yesterday's blog, I realize that fear makes bad choices. I make wrong decisions when I get frightened even if I don't identify fear as the guiding energy. I think I am rational, but I am not. Fear fools me. So I am trying to practice faith, me of Little Faith. The world is not out to get me, nor do I have to hunker down to protect myself. I don't want the monastery to become a place to run away to because I cannot handle my plans being trashed by powers out of my control. I trust that I am going to be OK. Lots of people have way more problems than I do. I mask up and show up both in meditation in the next right thing to do, fear-free.
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I can't say that I am fear free, but I am grateful that I know how to recognize it these days. It's even better when I hit the pause button so that I have the opportunity to recognize it sooner, lol. I had a train over worries blasting the whistle before meditation yesterday and I was able to 'unpack' each worry and set them aside so I could give the to God during my meditation. It made letting go much easier and the train became quiet. We do this all together and I appreciate how much I learn from you every day. Thanks for always being there, Father Ryan. :) Have a happy day!
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