Incurable Mediocrity*

I may be incurably mediocre but this is not a bad thing as long as I know it is incurable, left to my own strength and willpower.  I think it is better to know that alone I am mediocre, rather than think delusionally that I am some kind of comic book hero.  The latter is all ego and self-centered fear that I might not be enough.  Mediocrity can seek help to rise above mediocrity.  I seek a community of people who can assist me to become more than mediocre through the relationships.  I am incurable only when left to my own self to solve all problems and deal with all situations.  I seek a spiritual path that is relational, with a power in the relationship that I cannot have alone.  I start out each morning with the idea that if I don’t get some help, I will have a mediocre day at best.  Alcohol, sex,drugs, food, exercise always had a component of “more” to them.  And a bit too much self-focus.  When I have had a good day, I usually have done something for someone else.  Just showing up can do a lot for another person.  There is very little love in mediocrity.