Surrender

 There are two kinds of “surrender” when it comes to change. The first is the one with which I am most personally familiar.  “I am going to surrender my old ways and change my life.”  Here I am the active changer.  The energy for such change is shame and guilt, with maybe some embarrassment, remorse added in.  It has never worked.  It is short term as is my memory.  The second change is powered by love.  I surrender to someone I love.  Then I allow them to change me through our relationship of love. Think long term spousal or partner marriage relationship.  Here in the monastery, and in my daily prayer efforts and living with imperfect people,  I surrender to my understanding of God, and let the change come from the God power.  Of myself, not much power.