Today, will I bother to love? Somedays loving seems like a bother. Apathy is guiding me. Any gathering, be it recovery, worship service, family, I am like a crab. I enter the gathering and scuttle like a crab to find a place where space rather than people are around me. Then I sink down into my shell. I am backing into survival, or trying to get an isolated spiritual fix, or just doing my duty, showing up. But at least I am there. Maybe grace will be at work and some energy will bring me to lift my head out of my shell, and then bother myself to love, to connect with another person. I will begin to think less about me and more about another person. I am not the only one struggling today. On days when it is a bother to love, I am part of a vast audience, each of whom is struggling too. So, I bother. And grace abounds a bit more in the encounter, the effort of trying.
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And don’t forget the gift you have in being caring, smiling and bringing a sense of joy to others.
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