I have had what someone called, “A Sober Bottom.” My body is ingesting all the right stuff, but my spirit is a mess. Example: a relationship falls apart, or I have to move when I am not ready, or I lose a job that fulfills me, or I get very sick. I feel that my life is in ruins. I have no solutions to my unhappiness. I am confused and inarticulate when trying to express myself. This bottom is really a grace hidden behind or beneath my anxiety, fear, broken heart and confusion. It is a moment of surrender. Not to what, but from what. I surrender from trying to figure it all out. I don’t so much let go. I am still too attached. I let go of a solution that depends upon me figuring things out. An empty space is now within me. The “Nearness” has some space to be felt in Presence and to be the Power that is not mine. Why cannot spiritual development be easier?!!!
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Almost three years living a pandemic is a good teacher.
ReplyDeleteWhen negativity comes into my life I talk to my Lord about it then I put it in his hands. I heard a cute story about Pope John the 23rd. Someone asked him how can he sleep at night with all the problems going on in the world? He told them before he went to sleep he told Our Lord he handled all that was going on in the world he was going to sleep and he told Our Lord take care of the problems through the nigh I just love what he said
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