Tact

 I tend to be critical.  Someone told me how to do this with "tact."  It is the art of "telling someone to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the trip."  I do ponder this advice.  It does soften a critical nature, while at the same time not letting some bad behavior go unmentioned or ignored.  I just have not quite figured out how to do that.  But it is creative.   I do recall a waitress telling an over weight guy who was ordering a lot of sugar sweets, that he must like heaven because he seems to want to get there sooner rather than later.  He gave her a big tip and went veggie.  What can I say?