Who Is Where?

The question is not, "Is God in me?"  People with that question, try to go deep, whatever that is, in prayer, so as to get to God in their very center.  They meditate.  They try to let go of surface thoughts and feelings.  Empty out.  But what if God is not in me?  I am in God.  I am in the center of God.  If God were the ocean, I am a within a shell in the center of the water, a shell that needs to be cracked, battered away, worn away, because that shell separates me from God.  So I don't so much go within to I get rid of the shell.  Bad behavior, judgments, the need for superiority, esteem, power, control are some of the things that make up the shell.  Part of the prayer is to find ways to recognize these shortcomings of shell.  And let God break us open, as by ourself, we cannot.  Some people meditate on the Big Book, the Bible, a good spiritual book, not to be read so as to finish, but to be read slowly, so we can chew on whatever takes hold of us.  With some embarrassment, "Is this really me?" and acceptance of our human powerlessness, we will be taken deep, in that the shell will be cracked open.  So read slowly.  Pause as Grace moves you.  We will all die not having read a lot of good books.