The Mirror

 Parents are the first mirror for their infant child. The child begins to know itself from how the parents act, speak, are present to the child.  Self-value can begin to develop.  Likewise, a newcomer to recovery or to a church will perceive themself from signals given by those already in the room or worship space.  If ignored, the newcomer sees themself as low value, an outsider and intrusion and so on.  Welcoming is important.  This is why Recovery meetings are focused on the newcomer.  By showing care and concern and friendship, the “old-timers” allow the newcomer to see value in themself.  The newcomer arrives with very low self-esteem.  They need new mirrors.  I always try to welcome the visitor or newcomer in church and other groups to which I belong.