When I miss someone it is because I find them be important in my knowing who I am. They listen and seem to understand or at least take me seriously. I suppose it the same when some one says that they miss me. It is the give and take. When I am self-absorbed, I am not in a listening mode. I may be funny, or entertaining, but that is just to shine a light on me.
No, a community is made up of listeners, of people who encourage one another to speak about themselves, their fears, hopes, sadnesses and joys. I hope that I can remember to say at least once a day in my ministry, "Well, tell me about yourself," or "How is your day really going?"