Puppy Love

I think one of the early indications that I had a contemplative bent to my life was when I "fell in Love" as a youth and young man. I had this insatiable desire to be with my beloved girlfriend. I thought about her all the time. I wrote poetry and letters when we were apart. I wanted to be with her and missed her when we were apart.

Well, that's too much for any girl or woman. Fortunately for them and me they moved on to some one else. I made enough mistakes to help that along. But I still had this space within me to fill. It was an emptiness, or openness that no one human person could fulfill. I was not marriage material. Only the infinite and the most intimate One could fill me up.

I found this Presence in my silence and solitude. Before this, silence and solitude were boredom and loneliness. I was restless and discontented. There was "something" missing, and it must be out there in the world, not in here, within me. Now I am in love with God and I can be with this Presence all the time. Our "dates" are when I take the time to sit quietly in solitude and just be. It is something much deeper than the "puppy love" of First Holy Communion.