Everybody Has Plans

We are going to die. OK. Now, let's live a balanced life. Grace at work is living a balanced life. Say what? Well, on one side is the delusion that I will not die, or as least it is so far into the future that I need not think about it. To keep this dying thing at bay, I will buy stuff, or do great things, be successful in whatever my field. I'll have control and power either in what I do or what I own.

On the other side is despair and depression. What is the use of doing anything, making any effort? I am just going to die. Life is meaningless. A balance is somewhere in between. Don't deny mortality or try and ward it off, but don't walk around filled with anxiety, sadness, hopelessness and despair. At times, God has a sense of humor in our reality.

Today I began to hay. My job was to get on the big tractor and turn the cut rows of hay so the wet underside would be facing up into the sun. I love this job. Big powerful tractor, bringing a task to completion, feeling a sense of accomplishment, and sitting on a soft tractor seat with a roof to keep me cool. This is my plan.

Deer flies are in season. They have other plans. Deer fly plans are to rise up from the turned hay and feast on the driver of the tractor. They are having lunch. My plan has become unpleasant. Whining to self does not stem the flow of blood. The deer fly is not thinking about mortality I suspect, just about having lunch. But in a week or so, all deer flies will be dead and gone. They are frantically enjoying their short life, at my expense.

While this is going on, a thunder cloud, wet and dark rises up over the mountain and comes toward my field. The cloud has plans. Someone has been praying for rain to prevent forest fires. They have plans or at least hopes for moisture. Rain on my hay at this time will ruin it and all the work I am doing while being lunch for the deer flies.

Now with all this going on to disturb my original plan, I could just go to one end of the spectrum and say, "What is the use? I am going to die anyway. Why bother with plans? Why bother at all!"

Mortality means that we live with limitations. My plans are somewhat limited in their success by the fact that everything else, and everyone else, has plans. To live a balanced life is to live aware of limitations. I can have plans, but don't expect them to happen. Eventually, I will wake up with a plan for the day, and not live to see the end of that day. Today's limitations are a preparation for entering into that final moment. No need to run out and buy something to displace reality. Just why did you buy that newest technological toy?